A Biblical Beast
Vengeance is Mine, and retribution, in due time their foot will slip. For the day of their calamity is near, and the impending things are hastening upon them.
Admitting that you have read or continue to read The Bible in this day and age isn’t quite as fashionable as it once was. A century-and-a-half ago a chap could ride into the village in a horse-drawn buggy, give his mutton chops a quick primp, straighten his dog collar a little and, within the hour, be sending the locals into a religious quasi-sexual frenzy with his command of the fire-and- brimstone end of The Good Book. But times change and quoting the Old Testament in 2018 is the social equivalent of offering to give a slideshow lecture of the time you went to Rhyl with Fred and Rose West. And this is a great shame, because some of the earlier work is a real hoot.
But there’s something else – something sadly lacking from most modern scientific discourse. The sense of the ineffably powerful, inconceivably wrathful and unknowably furious. The idea of a sentient force rampaging around the cosmos throwing thunderbolts, causing plagues of frogs and turning wives to salt for looking over their shoulder. We need this in our lives – this great fear and awe, for our own sanity. A world free from superstition and myth means we must create our own moral universe and, frankly, who wants that responsibility? Dreadful business.
We also need these arcane forms to describe a class of things for which objective measurements and precise descriptors fail to cut the mustard. Things like the Lamborghini Huracan Coupe, the nearest thing to an Old Testament experience the rational man is ever likely to encounter.
Do you recall the scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark where the Nazis perform a ceremony in the desert before opening the vessel that housed The Ten Commandments? Of course you do- the resulting Holy Wind melts the faces of the fascists and tears the world to bits for a few minutes.
Well that’s what it feels like you put your foot through the floor of this particular thunderbolt.
God is in the detail
For something so insanely powerful and immediate the Huracan is surprisingly usable and easy to push. And thanks to the intelligent approach fostered by Audi ownership it is even, dare I say it, approaching being a car that could be used everyday. For starters, the interior doesn’t decompose in your hand when you try and flip a switch or pull a handle.
Just don’t push too hard in the any of the AINIMA settings outside Strada, or comfort mode to you and I. Otherwise, you may find yourself meeting a cruel and jealous deity sooner than you hoped. After all, this is a Lamborghini for God’s sake.